Becoming a Gentle Mother: 3 Things I’ve Learned

Hey ladies!

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I love being a mother. It brings me so much joy!

Wouldn’t say that I’ve mastered this thing called motherhood, but I love the journey of growth and progression that I’ve made as a mother of 3. My goal is to be a loving, gentle mother to our girls at all times.

Here are three things that I’ve learned to help me become a gentle mother:)

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1. Be Happy

Honestly, there is nothing more inviting than being in a home with a happy woman. It’s like a little piece of heaven on earth! I’ve noticed how my husband and children are affected by my level of happiness. The home is filled with love, smiles, giggles, and even a safe place to make mistakes….such sweet serenity!

This doesn’t mean that every single moment will be sunny, but I’ve learned to take control of my happiness and especially my thoughts.

Thoughts create presence.

Don’t believe me? Ever walked into a room after an argument and immediately felt tension? The people may try to act like nothing is wrong , but you can FEEL the tension. You can cut the air with a knife because it’s so tense! The thoughts in your mind are producing the atmosphere around that you  desire.

◊ Helping Note:  Dear Sis, your mind is a womb. Only think what you want to produce!

So, Take control of your thoughts. If you’re having a tough day today read this out loud “ “…whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable….”( Phil 4:8)  I’ll think on THOSE things.

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2. Build. Don’t Break.

“A wise woman builds her house, a foolish woman brings it down with her own hands.”

It is our responsibility as women to build our homes. It’s a huge honor to be a mother. It’s also a huge responsibility.

–Build with Your Words

“She openeth her mouth with wisdom; And in her tongue is the law of kindness” (Proverbs 31:26)

“You’re stupid”

“Shut up and get away from me”

“I’m sick of you”

If you’ve said things like this, then ask for forgiveness, and work on speaking words over your children that build them up.

I’ve learned that to be a gentle mother we don’t treat or talk to our children in a condescending matter. I want our children to know that I love them for them no matter how many spills they make, how much they mess up, or even when they have their toddler tantrums. No one, not even me or you reading this, wants to be “talked down to”. Remember that not only are they your children, but they are people too. Treat them as such.

–Don’t Break Their Spirit

“Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged” Col. 3:20

The word discouraged here means to have a “broken spirit”.

We have to be so, so careful not to break our children’s spirit. I’m constantly in prayer always asking the Lord to guide me, even when I have to discipline our children , so that I won’t break their spirits.

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3. Be Kind to Yourself

I must admit, I can be extremely hard on myself as it relates to motherhood. There are times I feel like superwoman and times I feel like my “cape” has been burned and destroyed! I want to know if I’m doing enough, saying enough, being enough for our girls …but I have to remind myself, in our girls’ eyes “I’m already enough”.

They don’t care if I didn’t get 5 loads of laundry done in the day or if I finished my “to do” list. They still think the world of me. And your kids think the world of you, too. If you’re struggling to know this, may my words be an encouragement to you today.

Dear Lady, you’re already enough. 🙂

I read and meditate on scriptures often , and one of my favorite scriptures is Isaiah 40:11 “He gently leads those that have young”.

I read this often as a quick reminder that the Lord is gently leading me while I’m gently leading our girls. I can imagine Him holding me by my hand and leading me, not pulling me or tugging at me, but gently guiding me along this journey of motherhood. He is there to wipe my tears, relieve my anxieties, and reassure me that everything will be okay. And things will be okay.

Through the tantrums, good days, bad days, sick days, and everything in between it will be okay. So please Dear Lady, while you’re reminding yourself to be kind to your kids, don’t forget to please be kind to YOU ,too.

 

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