When the Preacher Wants Your Panties

Hey ladies!

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Now on to the blog…


Up until 7 pm last night, I had no idea that I would be writing this post. Then like a ton of bricks, God deposited this title into me, and the content began to flow.

I don’t know who all needs to read this blog, but I felt God’s heart and I believe that MANY need this.

This blog is for the woman that only wanted to be PRAYED for, yet got PREYED on by a preacher.

This one will be raw, real, and uncut.

Let’s go.


“I’m still the man of God”

That’s what he says to you after you all’s sexual frenzies in attempt to make you not “call him out“ on his sin.

He has no conviction and no desire to change so he wants to convince you never to cross him or try to expose him. He will tell you scriptures about how David committed sin, but was still a man after God’s own heart.

This is a manipulative tactic to cause you to avoid the seduction of what’s taking place between the two of you. As long as you see it as innocent you will be blindsided to the patterns that play out every single time you are chosen out of his group of women to be his mistress for the night.

That reminds me of my oldest girls, Hannah and Mya. When they are arguing and fussing the other one always tells me what the other one did wrong to try to take the blame away.

My question as I look to them individually is “But what did YOU do wrong”.


A man who won’t take responsibility for his actions is a man who still wants to hide in the dark. He is enjoying his lifestyle of sin. You aren’t responsible for his actions, but you are responsible for yours. 

Be delivered from the voices that taunt you saying “Well if God uses him so powerfully, his passion must not be wrong”. Honey, God also used a donkey in the Bible, remember? God can use whatever and whomever he uses but that doesn’t mean that YOU have to subject yourself to living a life beneath what God wants for you.

It’s not okay. It’s never been okay and will never be okay. He is quite comfortable in his lifestyle of sin.

Are you?


“I’m a man…I make mistakes too”

That’s what he says to you when he can’t manipulate you with his charisma or God given gift.

The only problem with this is that these sexual encounters you’re having with him are nowhere near mistakes. Neither are the ones he’s having with all the other women in other cities while you’re at home still believing that he will soon acknowledge that you’re his God sent wife.

It’s one thing to be a man that makes mistakes, but it’s a completely different thing for his mistakes to be a lifestyle.

Remember this, Mistakes are not premeditated and neither are they pre-planned.


Be Free 

Be honest with yourself when you know something doesn’t feel right.

You know when you’re being violated.

From him you may experience feelings of being seduced, being manipulated, or just being downright uncomfortable.

NONE of those are attributes of the Holy Spirit. 


And then…some of you are okay.

You’re okay with being the side piece. You’re okay with flying into a city where he is, getting to wear your best “First Lady” attire at church, and sitting on the front row.

You feel special because his “crew” knows all about you. They also know what’s going down after the church service…and you do too.

Until you have read this post you have been okay with that. Although he has treated you like a KFC meal only wanting your breasts, legs, and thighs.

You. Have. Settled. For. That.

Because deep down you either only want the sex too, or you believe that he has intentions on marrying so you’re just waiting around to see what will happen.

You sit in his church services and look around to see if any other woman is looking at him with “those eyes”…you notice a few, but you shake it off because you know that you’re the one he wants to be with…or at least you’re the one who will be in his hotel room that night.

In your mind, if you can’t have all of him, at least you will have part of him.

But as I’m writing this, the Holy Spirit has arrested you because God loves you so much.

I’m writing this to you because I love you so much and I’m tired of seeing you hurt and confused.


Be delivered from the delusion that’s driving your decisions.

You don’t have to make any announcements, ultimatums, or threats… just decide that you won’t partake in this anymore.


You are worth so much more. 

◊ Helping Note:  Dear Sis, know your worth. You are the apple of the Father’s eye. 

♥ You deserve a man who will not only be faithful to you, but will be faithful to God.

♥ You deserve a man who will wed you.

♥ You deserve a man who will be do things the right way.

♥ You deserve the absolute best.

Remember this, things don’t go wrong, they start wrong.

Change your number, block him on social media, and, if need be, don’t go to his church services. There are lots of other churches and services where you can be spiritually fed.

Guard your heart, honey. In order to be free, you have to want to be free and take the ACTIONS to be free.

So , I’m praying hard for you.

Do. Not. Settle


Also, part 2 of this is coming soon as well as a free gift to subscribers.

Love you so much,

♥Amanda Ferguson♥
Wife. Mother. Author.

64 Comments

  1. Karen on 10 Feb 2017 at 10:13 am

    Wow this is good . I love it and will take heed to this . Thank you for sharing . So many women get caught up in this mess and we need to be told the truth . Lord have mercy !

    • amandafergusonblog on 10 Feb 2017 at 10:15 am

      amen and thank you for reading 🙂

    • Terisa Kimmins on 10 Feb 2017 at 10:28 am

      Awesome insight Lady Amanda! Continue to allow God to use you for the Kingdom!

  2. theeagle12 on 10 Feb 2017 at 10:39 am

    Once again…words can NEVER express what this blog means to me!!! I’m hollering before the LORD and in tears!!! For how I’ve tried to encourage my sisters and tell them their worth…how grateful I am for you to have a platform to obey the Spirit of our Father to release this truth! Love you much my sister…love you much!

  3. Ambassador_April on 10 Feb 2017 at 10:42 am

    What a timely word for the body of Christ!! We need to hear this word God put in you!! So needed Jesus!! May the ??? of God rest on you Woman of God!! This bless me rightoues and truth. We must live a Holy life style. We can not preach one thing and live another!! Love you sis ☺

  4. Angel Bond on 10 Feb 2017 at 10:54 am

    Powerful blog Mrs. Ferguson!!!! Words of wisdom, truth, and genuine love. I love reading your blogs every week I’m learning and gaining something new everyday. “Best Author Goes To Queen Mrs.Ferguson??????”

  5. alisamiller26 on 10 Feb 2017 at 11:21 am

    I believe this need to be discussed openly more often. It’s heartwrenching to know people who are supposed to be leaders are taking and using people that was entrusted to them for their own lustful desires! Yes! Expose them for who they are…wolves in sheep clothing. Heartbreaking…but whoa to the pastor that causes God’s sheep to scatter. There’s plenty more to say about this, but I’ll leave it at this..great post. Love you. God bless you.

  6. iamimariowens on 10 Feb 2017 at 11:59 am

    This was very good!

  7. Teresa on 10 Feb 2017 at 12:10 pm

    Wow a lot of people wouldn’t even talk about what goes on the churches around the world. May god continue to bless u

  8. iamimariowens on 10 Feb 2017 at 12:11 pm

    This was really good!!

  9. T. Campbell on 10 Feb 2017 at 1:16 pm

    …A KFC meal, Lady Amanda??!!! You are too much. That’s hilarious!!!
    However, the underlying message is not. Well done, Sis!

  10. marvagossgmailcom on 10 Feb 2017 at 1:16 pm

    Okay, Mrs Ferguson, you’re spoiling us with the blog posts! Love it! Thanks again!

  11. steps4changeblog on 10 Feb 2017 at 1:18 pm

    Good Word Mrs. Amanda!!!!!!! Oh guess what?? I wasn’t subscribed to your blog that is why I did get my freebie!! Remember when I kept saying “am I slow” on instagram the other week cause I did not know what you were talking about, but I got it now.. thanks!!!!!

  12. Kady on 10 Feb 2017 at 1:18 pm

    This is an awesome blog.. thank you so much for sharing it because it helped me.. I truly admire the woman of God that you are.. Your awesome, love you!

  13. teairacarlton on 10 Feb 2017 at 1:19 pm

    This couldn’t have been written any better! Great post!

  14. steps4changeblog on 10 Feb 2017 at 1:19 pm

    I meant I didn’t get my freebie!!!

  15. Dominique Timms on 10 Feb 2017 at 1:28 pm

    Jesus Powerful Blog Sis!

  16. Anonymous on 10 Feb 2017 at 1:35 pm

    Why is it always the mans fault? Women know exactly what it is going into it, and really aren’t that innocent. A strong woman can’t be used or manipulated unless she wants to be. 90% of the time the women that sleep with these preachers do it because they are attracted to the anointing and power that they have. The problem is, when they move on and are no longer needed for the role they’ve played, they now want to be “spiritual” and expose the man. If you can’t handle the role of being what you were originally needed for (the side piece) its best not to play in that field, because unfortunately you’ll never become Wifey…Great read though!

    • amandafergusonblog on 10 Feb 2017 at 1:59 pm

      Some women do know, but some really don’t know.

    • alisamiller26 on 10 Feb 2017 at 5:44 pm

      I must humbly insert here that her blog does state that each person is to be responsible for their own actions. I believe a pastor whether male or female has a greater responsibility on themselves. Why? The bible says ‘not many should become teachers, knowing such will incur a stricter judgment.’ God’s people are in their care and how they are handled is of great importance. Not desiring to be argumentative, just wanted to voice my opinion in love. ☺

      • Ama on 10 Feb 2017 at 6:12 pm

        I agree; she stated both men and women are responsible for their actions.

      • amandafergusonblog on 10 Feb 2017 at 6:22 pm

        thank you 🙂

      • Carol Stewart-Williams on 11 Feb 2017 at 11:48 am

        I agree, Preacher, Pastors, Teachers etc have been given a role that says I’m responsible for your spiritual and mental health.Women who allow themselves to be used are many times -have had a past of been abused in one way or the other. Women know your self worth. Would Jesus violate one of his followers?. Not being judgemental but SEX is not only physical it is spiritual. MOG and WOG -FEAR GOD. Stop stealing marital rights -get your flesh under subjection and be accountable to God fearing men and women.
        Thank you Lady Ferguson.

  17. Sharin miles on 10 Feb 2017 at 2:16 pm

    THIS SHOULD BE POSTED IN THE CHURCH BULLETIN…BEAUTUFUL BLIG HEALING FOR THE SOUL?????

  18. Toni on 10 Feb 2017 at 3:17 pm

    WOW! This word will preach all by itself! Woman of God, I’m so proud that you have spoken what the Lord has said in this predicament women find themselves in! Truly a word in season. Continue to stand flat footed and remain bold, speaking the truth in love! God Bless you.

  19. Annette McGhee on 10 Feb 2017 at 3:35 pm

    Great topic, I have enjoyed reading this blog. I have seen this type of woman/(women) many times in the church. I would laugh because she thought she was “it”. As I grew older I lost respect for certain preachers. I knew as I grew older they would try to lure me in. I’m glad that I know my “worth”. I’m sharing & praying
    Thanks Amanda

  20. Ama on 10 Feb 2017 at 4:21 pm

    This was very good and much needed. It frustrates me when I see a man of God being manipulative whether it is pertaining to sex, money, etc. I really hope the women and men who read this will be free! What angers me even more is when the man of God (or woman of God) have been exposed the same lies are used so there are reprimands. Father help us all!

  21. mrstierraj on 10 Feb 2017 at 5:34 pm

    OMG!!! Amanda!!! This! ? I’ve experienced this very thing! The violation part! The words said “I’m still a man of God” were the exact words! The enemy still throws it in my face!!! I’m going to inbox you through messenger.

  22. Krystal on 10 Feb 2017 at 7:33 pm

    Wow Prophetess, this message is needed. Thank you following the Holy Spirit and allowing us to use this as guidance. I’m definitely sharing this with a few ladies.

  23. Soccora Anderson on 10 Feb 2017 at 8:13 pm

    In TEARS, I’m here now…. Praying for release from this soul tie.. Thank you for your RAW, REAL,HONEST blog.. Prayers Please…

  24. Desirae Williams on 10 Feb 2017 at 9:09 pm

    I’m glad I finally had time to read this blog!!! The title really drew me in… My prayer before I met my husband was (still is), I want a husband who is faithful to God first.. So glad God answered my request. Thank you Amanda❤❤

  25. Rosalind on 11 Feb 2017 at 1:02 am

    This was a great article! This article drew me in, it was right on time. This has happened to so many ladies in waiting, all they see is the outside so called glamour which is a mere camouflage of fallen grace! Never to really see the manipulation of the true enemy being used by the (man of God)!

  26. admin on 11 Feb 2017 at 2:39 am

    GIRL!!!!! You got me screamin’ over here!!!!! #WhereIsMyOffering I cannot tell you the amount of pastors who’ve tried to pull this on me!! I’ve been groomed as a “backup wife” when I thought I was just a daughter in the spirit. I’ve been the girlfriend they wanted to sleep with (and saw NOTHING wrong with it!!). I’ve been treated like I was crazy, arrogant (because I guard myself around male ministers, especially young ones), religious, and just all around delusional because I tried to call them on their mess. (“You’re making me feeeel bad!!” Well, sir, that would be because you’re behaving badly!!!) I’ve had them try to lay the groundwork to be with me, not knowing if they wanted 1) to just get my panties, 2) to date AND sleep with me, or 3) to court me. This tomfoolery needs to be called out, checked hard, and stopped permanently!!!! But how can these men honestly be checked (’cause you know they won’t listen to us women!) if 1) they don’t have spiritual fathers that they are TRULY accountable to or 2) the [spiritual] fathers they do have are busy perfecting this craft themselves?! #FixItJesus #BeDelivert

    Women DO have a part to play and many times to own up to, yet the Bible is clear that it is a much greater sin to LEAD someone into sin than to simply fall into it. Both require repentance, but the latter carries a greater weight because [in this instance] these men of God are very often using their priestly roles to control and manipulate them women under their influence. God struck down Hophni and Phineas for the very same thing – sleeping with women in the doorway of the Tabernacle!! Causing the Lord’s people to transgress!! Lord!! You got me on a roll tonight!!! *throws offering*

    • amandafergusonblog on 11 Feb 2017 at 7:11 am

      Wow thanks for your feedback!

      • admin on 11 Feb 2017 at 7:18 am

        My pleasure! And yes, I sent in my offering! 😉 You’ve also inspired by latest blogpost!

  27. Mildred Hood on 11 Feb 2017 at 12:45 pm

    Hi Amanda you have wisdom on relationships that are so much needed in the body of Christ today and you are a blessing continue to pour into us even the older women divorce and especially those who are single !!!

  28. Shaquee Miller on 11 Feb 2017 at 1:24 pm

    As always, it never amazes me of how God uses you! As a young lady after Christ, It’s always awesome and helpful to hear great advice like this! Thanks so much! God bless you!

  29. Ronni on 11 Feb 2017 at 4:02 pm

    I wish I would’ve read this a few years ago. You do get that uneasy feeling. Don’t ignore it! That’s the Holy Ghost there to save you from shame and heartache. I thought he was just a concerned friend….nah he just wanted in. Lost what I THOUGHT was a good friend/brother. I had to cut all ties but it was for the best.

  30. Angela on 11 Feb 2017 at 7:13 pm

    Thank you for this blog. Although I have never experienced this as all the Ministers I know are decent anf faithful to God. I guess there are some people out there that may be like you say. I pray that the Lord gives strength to the victim to break the chains of bondage of that unhealthy relationship.

  31. Karla Vargas on 13 Feb 2017 at 2:53 pm

    THIS!!!!

  32. Yashika Woodward on 14 Feb 2017 at 11:51 pm

    Wow amen? I have been here before You nailed it sister.

  33. Katrina on 24 Jul 2017 at 3:49 pm

    Greetings Mrs. Amanda,

    Very interesting insight! I appreciate your wisdom on this topic. I agree with another reader on this thread that things such as this is not talked about much in the Church community. I believe it should, although with clarity, wisdom and love. So hat people may know and understand that tis is not only wrong but dangerous grounds.

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